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Domestic Abuse Practice

Professional Curiosity in Domestic Abuse Practice: A Practical Guide

20 July, 2026
Female colleagues in indepth conversation

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What is Professional Curiosity?

Professional curiosity is the ability and willingness to explore and understand what is happening in a person’s life, rather than accepting things at face value.

It involves:

  • Asking questions beyond initial answers
  • Being open to uncertainty
  • Looking for patterns, inconsistencies, and hidden risk
  • Maintaining a respectful but questioning mindset

In domestic abuse work, professional curiosity is essential because harm is often hidden, minimised, or controlled by others.

Why Professional Curiosity Matters

Domestic abuse rarely presents clearly. Victims may:

  • Minimise or deny abuse
  • Feel fear, shame, or loyalty
  • Be under coercive control
  • Be unable to speak freely

Without curiosity, practitioners may:

  • Miss escalating risk
  • Accept incomplete or misleading information
  • Over-rely on checklists or disclosures
  • Close cases prematurely

No disclosure does not mean no risk.

Core Principles of Professional Curiosity

  • Stay Open-Minded
  • Avoid making assumptions based on:
    • Presentation (“they seem fine”)
    • Background or culture
    • Previous case history
  • Look Beneath the Surface
  • Explore:
    • Daily routines
    • Relationships and power dynamics
    • Changes in behaviour
  • Be Respectfully Persistent
  • It is okay to:
    • Ask follow-up questions
    • Revisit topics
    • Gently challenge inconsistencies
    • Use Uncertainty as a Prompt

If something feels unclear or “not quite right,” explore it further.

What Professional Curiosity Looks Like in Practice

Moving Beyond Closed Questions

Instead of:

  • “Are you safe?”

Try:

  • “What does a typical day look like at home?”
  • “When do things feel most difficult or unsafe?”

Exploring Behaviour and Context

  • “What happens when you disagree?”
  • “How does your partner respond when you go out or speak to others?”

Noticing Non-Verbal Cues

Pay attention to:

  • Anxiety or hesitation
  • Frequent phone checking
  • Partner speaking on behalf of the individual
  • Missed or cancelled appointments

Gently Challenging

  • “You’ve said things are okay, but you also mentioned feeling scared, can you tell me more about that?”

Barriers to Professional Curiosity

Practitioners may experience:

  • Time pressure and high caseloads
  • Fear of offending or damaging relationships
  • Assumptions or bias
  • Over-reliance on assessment tools
  • Professional optimism (“things will improve”)
  • Discomfort with uncertainty or complexity

Recognising these barriers is the first step to overcoming them.

Applying Curiosity to Risk Assessment

Risk assessment tools (e.g., DASH) are important, but they should not replace professional thinking.

Ask yourself:

  • What is not being said?
  • What doesn’t fit?
  • What am I assuming?
  • Is there evidence of coercive control?

Always consider:

  • Patterns over time
  • Escalation
  • The broader context (children, isolation, finances, control)

Practical Techniques to Build Professional Curiosity

  • Pause before closing or stepping down a case
  • Use supervision to explore uncertainty
  • Revisit cases assessed as “low risk”
  • Reflect on your first impressions
  • Seek multiple sources of information where appropriate
  • Use phrases such as:
    • “Help me understand…”
    • “Can you tell me more about…”

Reflective Practice

Regular reflection strengthens professional curiosity.

Consider:

  • When have I accepted things too quickly?
  • What influenced my judgement?
  • What would I do differently next time?
  • What patterns am I noticing across my cases?

Ethical Considerations

Professional curiosity must always be:

  • Respectful – avoid interrogation or blame
  • Trauma-informed – recognise the impact of abuse
  • Safe – do not increase risk through questioning
  • Proportionate – balance curiosity with professional boundaries

Key Messages

  • Curiosity is a safeguarding skill, not an optional extra
  • Domestic abuse is often hidden and complex
  • “No disclosure” does not equal “no harm”
  • Assessment tools support, but do not replace, professional judgement
  • Respectful persistence can uncover critical information
  • Staying curious can save lives

“What might I be missing?”

This simple question is at the heart of professional curiosity and should guide all domestic abuse practice.

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‘Hysterical’

Calling women ‘hysterical’ if they appear distressed, upset or disturbed often discounts their experiences. Other labels used can include, but are not limited to, “unstable” or “over-reacting”, “unable to keep their emotions in check”.  These statements are routed in sexism.

Another thing to note is that the description of being hysterical is provided by the alleged abuser. Often abusers will try to manipulate professionals in a bid to sabotage the victims’ credibility and to minimise or detract from the abuse.

Language is extremely important in documentation as the documentation will provide a narrative of what is happening and will often determine what course of action will be needed next.

Documentation may be called for as evidence in both civil and criminal cases, including family court for protective orders or child contact arrangements.

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‘Male appeared calm and assisted with enquiries’
We cannot assume that because one party displays anger and aggression or is less in control of their emotions that they are a primary perpetrator. It is a myth that perpetrators “lose control” or have anger management issues when they abuse their partners. Domestic violence is the most often, the opposite of losing control; perpetrators know what they are doing and use their abusive tactics of choice to maintain dominance in the relationship.
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Verbal argument only
It is important to remember that many couples argue, but for an argument to escalate to the point that the neighbours fear for a person’s safety that they phone the police on the emergency number, this should warrant further in-depth investigation. Statements such as “verbal argument only” will minimise harm and fear caused by verbal abuse. In turn it will also minimise the victims experience of the incident. The danger of using language that may minimise an abusive incident is that it will send a message to victims that the act was not abusive and if the victim felt it was abusive then they are over-reacting. Over time, this can lead to an escalation of abuse if the warning signs are not spotted, or intervention is not offered at the earliest opportunity. Furthermore, the statement ‘Verbal Argument Only’ suggests that only physical violence is worthy of investigation. However, the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 defines domestic abuse as:  Behaviour is “abusive” if it consists of any of the following—
  • (a)physical or sexual abuse;
  • (b)violent or threatening behaviour;
  • (c)controlling or coercive behaviour;
  • (d)economic abuse (see subsection (4));
  • (e)psychological, emotional or other abuse;
The act makes it clear that verbal abuse is part of domestic abuse.
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